Last Saturday, a 31-year-old woman was a bridesmaid at the wedding of her best friend.
Two years of meticulous planning by her best friend made this Sikh wedding an outstanding event. Even though her best friend moved four hours away a year ago, their bond remained strong. Despite not spending much time together since she moved, she constantly supports her friend.
She described that day as remarkable because it was such a unique opportunity that made her thrilled to enjoy the nightlong celebration.
“The whole day I was busy taking care of my responsibilities as a bridesmaid and attending to different needs like getting my pal to the restroom or getting some food for her,” she said. “With over 300 guests present, and numerous traditional rituals involved, she needed my assistance all through.”
In the evening, she had three cocktails but with every encounter with the husband; he appeared more drunk.
He downed seven beers before switching over to gin and lemonade. By the time the last ceremonial act was performed, he was too drunk to even maintain his balance.
After drinking too much, her husband saw her worry and asked her again and again what is wrong with her.
She said that they could talk later when he was sober, for he had spent twenty minutes asking her questions about his excessive drinking and her lack of help.
In addition, she and her husband observe a certain custom at wedding: the person who interacts more closely to bride and groom gets higher number of drinks while another takes the responsibility of being a designated driver.
Speaking about the wedding of her best friend, she related her fears to her husband and it looked like he has switched off.
Her husband is usually calm and easy-going, even after drinking, but that evening, his behavior was quite different.
“She recollected, ‘He insisted I gave him the keys of the car so that he could sit inside it and calm down. At first, I refuted this, but later I unlocked the car for him and put the keys in my handbag.'”
I felt so ashamed when one of the other bridesmaids saw everything. This was the first time he spoke to me like this or behaved towards me in such a manner.
“In the end, we had no choice but to leave the event. I was overwhelmed and crying while he was too drunk to handle it himself. We left as my best friend’s other bridesmaids and her closest friends kept partying hard till 2am in the morning. On top of this, before everything occurred, my friend had just broken down into tears grateful for my help and looking forward to a night-long celebration with us.”
She is looking for ways to move on from this experience. The embarrassment, disappointment and sadness still weigh heavily on her mind.
Her husband often goes out at night to relax, leaving her disappointed and unable to unwind herself.
“Despite the fact that I want him to feel what I am feeling, I know that is not me. My only desire is that he would put what I want before what he needs,” she said.
What advice would you give her?
